I think alot goes on with a person before they turn to alcohol, drugs, fill-in-the-blank addiction. I feel that the addiction is a self-medication. I just wish people could get themselves help before they turn to an addiction. I don't think anyone wakes up and decides to become an addict. I think it's usually at the end of a long road of crap.
MyGirlElena brought up a good point, about my son and my parents. I feel my son has inherited his medical problems from my dad. Ever since I heard about bipolar disorder, um, about 20+ years ago, I have believed my dad is an alcoholic. He is also a hoarder, which is the secondary reason my mom, sister, and I left my dad. Well, there was the cheating, abuse, inappropriate behavior as well. Later on I realized I figured my dad also has OCD, Add/Adhd, perhaps some form of Aspergers..................the possibilities are endless. He can barely function in life.
Anyway, I firmly believe my son has inherited the cyclothymia (mild bipolar) & ADHD from my Dad. Very sad. I truly wish my relatives could get the help they need.
I think I'll go browse thru my "Co-Dependant No More" by Melody Beattie..................I read it atleast once a year. I highly recommend it as the best book for a person with a relative(s) with addiction(s). It's a must read. There are follow up books as well.
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I would think that this young man is depressed... living in filth, sleeping all day, not showering, not responsible for his one meager chore... 21 is an adult by all means and I was shocked that she was ordering the book for her grown up son.... but I guess we never stop being parents.
You would think the natural consequences of his body odor issues would be enough for him... who wants to hang around someone who smells
My advice would be to treat him like the 21 year old he is, expect him to pull his weight, pay rent and smell appropriate
a young male family member of my husbands would act similar to this... brooding & sulking like he was always pissed at the world and then thank goodness he outgrew that stage
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