Diagnosis

Today I took our 4yr(almost 5yrs) old to our standing Monday counseling appt. We've been doing this for over three months. At the prodding of the PCIT teacher, I asked the counselor today what diagnose(s) we are looking at for our daughter. Hold onto your hat:

Brain Damage-permanent (due to trauma, neglect, and/or FAS/FAE)
Developmental Delay-permanent (due to trauma, neglect, and/or FAS/FAE)
Attachment Issues (not RAD)
ADD (meds will help)

She also feels our daughter has FAS/FAE, but she is not qualified to diagnose that. She is looking for other hospitals in our state that can evaluate that so we can have this diagnosed before the seven month wait for UW. She feels FAS/FAE answers all our questions about our daughters delays, problems, behaviors, emotions, conversations, etc. She said she would be shocked if she doesn't get a FAS/FAE diagnosis. That would be great, but shocking.

Additionally she feels our daughter has Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, but the DSM-IV changed and has a new requirement: daily flashbacks, which our daughter does not have. But she does have PTSD according to the old diagnosis. Also she feels she has multiple personality tendencies, but that can't be diagnosed until an older age. There's another clinical name now for multiple personalities, and I forget the name. She said to have full blown multiple personalities, you have to have one personality that is deviant, destructive, and not attached to anyone. She feels our daughter is bonded with me and her sister, so feels it's "only" multiple personality tendencies.

I'm not surprised at some of this, but I'm shocked at other aspects.

This counselor has had some recent unpleasant conversations with the state SW. He is not pushing for diagnosis(es) because if those go on her permanent record, and we disrupt, there's about a 99% chance she will never be adopted. There's not droves of people waiting in line to adopt a kid with all these medical/health/emotional/behavior permanent issues. So they want us to finalize the adoption before there are any diagnosis. Wrong pal. The counselor told this guy to get honest, and we are entitled to that. We are also entitled to the state paying for all her medical bills (and surrounding issues) once she is diagnosed, so we have to get the evals done before adoption finalization. My husband and I want our daughter provided for in as many ways as possible. Medicaid doesn't cover everything, so we need to have her evals done and the state issue permanent funding. I'm not even sure at this point if that's thru Social Security or grants, but it has to get taken care of. I shudder at the thought of dealing with SS over all this.

I'm going to put the girls down and take a nap myself. I'm a little overwhelmed. I may not have written in coherant sentances above.