The Working Mommy Debate

Quick health update: I went to the doctor Monday. I have the flu, a sinus infection, and both ears are infected. Yesterday I felt entirely worse. So I checked back in with the doctor and now have pneumonia as well. Good times. The antibiotics I started Monday should cover the pneumonia, it will just take me an additional 2-3 days to start feeling well. Sigh.

I want to do a post on the Working Mommy Debate. Ya know, often with my husband he thinks the grass is always greener some other way. When I worked, he compained that we didn't have enough time together, to get stuff done, to clean. He felt we didn't have enough time to do the fun things we wanted to do in life. He thought I didn't get enough sleep, and was therefore, grouchy. He didn't like sharing in midnight kiddie vomit & fevers. Now that I've been a fulltime SAHM for over a decade, while only working parttime a couple years of that, he feels like we never have enough money. He thinks we need more money to retire, save, vacation, buy retirement property, etc.

Frankly, I've always felt happy with both situations. I never felt like there was an easy black and white answer either way. I did well either way, and things worked out. I was a corporate accountant for several years before having kids. I continued this into my second pregnancy, and haven't been back. I worked part time for a couple years when our 3rd son was in preschool and kindergarten. Then I quit that job to deal with my new parttime job: adoption. This resulted in years of work, but finally an adoption. The girls were in our lives six months. Now that road has come to an end (at least for now).

Without children here during the day, I feel empty. It takes me five minutes to pick up the house, and I'm done. Yes, that is a blessing to have an easily cleaned house!! But what I'm saying is, I want more.

I've done the professional volunteering thing. My husband feels it's slavery, and is fine with me doing very little or none, currently. Volunteer at church, the community, fundraisers, local schools, etc. It can be a fulltime job. Rewarding? absolutely. Interested currently? not really.

A friend told me months ago that her employer is hiring. So I filed that in the back of my mind. Since I've been laying around sick with nothing better to do for a week now, I've had alot of time to think: I want to go back to work. So I called my friend, and they are still hiring. I checked into the job formally the last couple days, and found great information. I spoke with her HR director who said "PLEASE apply for this job............"

One thing that appeals to me about this job is the rotating schedule. I have noticed in my past working experience, that with accounting it's really only a 9-5 sort of thing. Then there was a rush to get kids to daycare, or bring in the babysitter, and evenings were spent cleaning & grocery shopping, while trying to get to sporting events. I was perpetually tired, even though things did all work out in the end. This job I'm looking into has three shifts: 6am-2pm, 2pm-10pm, and 10pm-6am. Everyone rotates a shift every four months. This actually interests me. The new sleep schedule coming with graveyard does not sound appealing, but I would be home and awake for my kids at breakfast and dinner. I could go to their afterschool/evening sports. The other shifts are fine as well. 6am-2pm would require a babysitter, but that can always be worked out.

And the pay is fantastic. Full benefits, and starting vacation is five weeks a year. (luring me in..............................)

The problem: my husband. He's encouraging me to work if I want, but he says he'll miss me while I work fulltime. He doesn't want to go to sleep without me. When I work 2nd shift, I won't be home for dinner (I told him we can have a couple lunch dates per week those months), he's not liking how this will require more of him and I won't be around. All valid points. He's told me to get a hobby, go walking, enjoy life. Well, I do those things and want more. I don't want to quilt full time. He says he wouldn't either. Not to mention, most hobbies cost money, which we don't have alot of. He about had a heart attack last year when I spent $199 getting several years worth of photos printed on Shutterfly. So then I put off those hobbies which cost alot of money. Even though I enjoy those hobbies................

I am applying for the job. At a minimum, it will be good to have an interview process under my belt again since I haven't worked since 2005.

I feel too young to "retire" at this point in my life, as appealing as that would be to alot of people. I think the money I earn in current dollars will be great saved for retirement. I'm in my upper 30's. Got alot of years left. I enjoy being with people, and working with people. I like being productive and having a place in this world.

My question is, am I missing anything in the debate here? Again, I don't think there's any always/never sort of situation. Right now though, I'm going nuts staying home with no kiddies here.